It's been a very long time since I put my thoughts here. A lot has been happening and a lot will continue to happen because that's how life works, right?
I was cleaning up the kitchen tonight and wiping down counters while bopping along to my music. I have two little girls who are waiting for snuggles and a happy boy who picked Mary Poppins to watch for our family movie time. The new to us $15 dishwasher is running, the dishes are all done, the living tidied. Its quiet. I have happy tired kiddos. Our bills are paid. We are loved.
While puttering about in my kitchen tonight I was wiping down the kitchen island we have. And thinking about the amazing couple who gifted it to us. There are already scratched on the top where I have cut things when I shouldn't have. The handle at the end in missing as well, too many kids hung off it before it finally broke. We've made pasta at that island, served dinner to others, its seen a lot of pizza there as well. Every time I wipe it down, I think of our Tyler's. I smile. I pray over them. I thank the Lord for them.
I put up some important tax papers I found today. I forgot I stashed them somewhere and I knew I needed to put them away or I would be mad I lost them later. I have a cool way to store important documents now, because my biggest brother said to me once, "It doesn't matter HOW you stay organized so long as it makes sense to you and Blair." He was right. We've gotten much better about that because of him. When I put things away now, I always think of him now. I did today. I smiled. I prayed over him and his family. I thank the Lord for them.
There are drying flowers in my kitchen. I moved some down to my desk, and put some of the roses I got Blair for Valentines Day up to dry. I love seeing those bundles and remembering why they were given and when. The bundle from when we were all sick and friends brought soup and flowers. The flowers sent to my mom this December for her and my Dads anniversary. I dry my flowers because Blairs younger sister does. She has these bundles all over her room. When I see these bundles, I smile. I pray over her. I thank the Lord that I love my sister in law.
I look around my kitchen and I see and feel the influence of so many lovely people. People who have shaped and changed me for the better. Wanting a stand mixer because of Chelsea, loading my dishwasher the way Carly does, the supplements I take because of Megan, the magnetic picture frames on my fridge from Michelle. The sign Danielle sent in the thick of Deans treatment, the utensil holder from Katharine, the magnets from Mimi, not to mention that post cards! So many wonderful post cards from so many wonderful people! There's so many people I could name. Each one so special to me. Each one making me stop and smile. Each thing reminding me to pray for these people I love so deeply.
I love seeing it all. Tonight it made cleaning the kitchen feel like being with friends, hearing their conversation and laughter in our little house. Marveling at where we were and where we are now. How perfection has taken a backseat to life, how messy it can be, but how fulfilling and loving.
We are made up of all the people we love.
I don't think I will ever be over the community that has become family that I have worked so hard for. All the ways I have absorbed their influences, and how deeply I feel humbled by that kind of love.
