No Fear In Love

It's a late night. The clock is ticking away the hours of my life, but I'm still not sleeping well, so I might as well write when I can't sleep, correct? :)

I don't mind to much. I thought today, I would share my growing up thoughts with you. Because, as much as I wish I could be Peter Pan (like my best friend Rebecca G is going to do) and never have to grow up, we all know the reality hits us with a two by four and no, we cannot stay young children forever.

I feel that in the past few months I have been thrown into Adulthood. More like I'm a squirrel and I got hit by a semi-truck. I bought a car, have paid rent twice, had to fix the car, had to get a new phone, had to take care of many monetary things. Though I know that my God has told me that worrying can't add one day to my life, I still seem to find time to do. I wonder what would happen if every time I started to worry about something, I prayed about it instead (hmmm, I sense an experiment coming up!). I bet things would change. I think things already have changed. Slowly, but surely, I am becoming a Woman, and not just a young Woman any more, but like, a real life one! Who knew!?

This weeks biggest issue was the phone. My Daddy (and yes, he is my Daddy) had to activate the new phones that he got for my mother, himself, and little brother. My old number when to the little brother. I was without a phone for what...a day? The same day that he did this, I bought a cell phone. Well, a cell phone plan, the phone was free. I got all bent out of shape for the ONE day. Which was stupid.

This leads me to the next thing that I would like to share. Every morning my Beloved texts me "Good Morning" add in there some I Love You's, Beautiful's, and My Love's. I think the reason I got so bent up about not having a phone, was because then I wouldn't get that text. Selfish, yes, true, yes.

Do you want to know what my Beloved did for me?

He woke up early, and before work, he stopped at my house, came into my room, gave me a kiss, and in person said, "I love you." Such a simple thing, but you know, out of all the things that I'm thankful for in this ending November month, it would be a man who loves me enough to get up early for me. See, I don't get up early for many people, so when people do that for me, when HE does that for me, I can't even begin to tell you how happy that makes my heart.

He truly loves me.

Oh wait, it gets better. I had work off today, and tomorrow. Tomorrow my mother and I  (that blessed Woman) are going to see to some wedding detail things. Which I'm super excited about (I do like spending time with her). I decided that today would be a good time to do some things at our house, finish up some painting, maybe finishing priming the back room. Well, I get a call from my Beloved telling me he has to go to Urgent Care because his back is spasming and hurts so bad he can't lift things (super not good for someone who works in a warehouse). The doctors gave him some muscle relaxers and pain killers (the real good kind) and sent him home to me. I got to play Nurse Maddie. After a nap, some good drugs, a eating pad, and food, he started to feel slightly better.

Do you want to know what my Beloved did for me?

Even though his back was still hurting him, he helped me hang a few things up that I've been wanting to put up for weeks. He took time to ask me where I wanted things, what I wanted up, how I wanted it hung. I love hanging and putting things on the walls, but actually doing it is hard for me. He knows that. He knows I would need his help. He helped me.

I have the honor and privilege of helping and serving and ministering to this man for the rest of my life. When I think of all the ways I've had to grow up these past few months, I realize that I am not scared of it at all. Not one bit, because so long as my Beloved is there, so long as he tells me good morning, so long as he challenges me in my faith, I am not scared.

Makes me think of 1 John 4:18

"There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear." 

So I am not Peter Pan, nor do I want to be him, because if I were, I would never have the honor to be marrying this wonderful amazing man of God. 

And that is what I wanted to share. :)

Laying on the floor, playing
with MY new phone. :) 

Hanging things up for me even
when he hurts. :)

The tree we stole from my parents to
make the house more festive!