Words of Life

"In the beginning was the Word, and the was with God and the Word was God."

We were spoken into existence with words. God spoke and therefore, we were, in all our ugly, beautiful, crazy, mundane, human glory.

Words. God used words to give us life.

Words hold so much weight and power. They have the power to heal, to tear down, to build up, to bring people to their knees. I'm reminded of a Dr. Who episode, "I can bring you down with words...Doesn't she look tired?" (For the record, I have no clue if I quoted that right, I'm not the Dr.Who fan, that's the husband.)

We are told as children that sticks and stones can break our bones, but words can never hurt us. What a load of crap. Someones words, carefully placed, can resonate in our heads for weeks and weeks and years and years. They have power. That's why God used to them to speak life into us.

Recently, some words were said about me. By who and about what are not important. What is important is since then, every single day has been a battle. A battle to fight the negative thoughts that crept into my heart. "You are not enough, you are not good, you are not worthwhile, you are worthless, useless, unloved..." Round and round and round.

I have been fighting friends, to remember the Truth. The Words that Jesus would speak into my life. Words about love and hope and encouragement. The gentle reminders that in my weakness, He is stronger. That my worth is from Him and Him alone. It is astounding that the words of one can out weigh the words of ten who do speak these words into my life.

My husband came home and found me in tears, because last night I wasn't feeling good, had gotten sick, and didn't cook him dinner. I was crying because I didn't cook him dinner. I was crying because there are two baskets of clothes that needed to be folded. I was crying because I was spotting yesterday, and was afraid for the baby I carry. I was crying because Ellie was crying and I couldn't vacuum. I was crying because those words had slowly seeped into my heart to make me so insecure that I thought that me not doing those things was going to affect my husbands love for me.

He took me into his arms and reminded me...

He reminded me that I am unfinished and imperfect. He reminded me that nothing I could do would make him love me less. He reminded me that he knows I'm doing my best. Without words he reminded me of Grace and Love and Forgiveness and that tomorrow is a brand new day. In one wordless hug he reminded me that for him, right now, I am enough. Just like I'm enough for the Lord.

I will always be careful with my words, and will apologize and beg forgiveness when I am not. Because the words I speak have so much power in peoples lives. Regardless of if I mean them to or not.

My daughter and this new baby I carry, will grow up hearing words from me.

It is my choice to speak life into their lives, or to use those words to put them down.

I will chose to speak life. It is the example I have been given, and it is beautiful.